THE PIGS AND "THE SECURITY STATE"

sunday, september 26, 2010

The Pigs And The Security State

Well. What a way to spend 30 minutes of an otherwise pleasant Sunday afternoon...

Two hotshot young piss ant pigs just HAD to pull me over after I made a perfect turn.

They claimed they pulled me over for not having a license plate in front. I told them that in the state it is registered in, you don't need one. They then asked me "all the questions" intended for one to incriminate oneself on anything.

I was not cuffed, but made to "spread 'em" while they took everything out of my pockets. Did it rough too, so I'd make a move of "resisting." I did not. I wanted to rip their lungs out. I did not.

Put in the back of the hot squad car. While they ransack my car.

Finally, they said, you are free to go.

I said nothing and left.

Now, I SAY-----

"Die Hard AND WITHOUT HONOR, MEANINGLESS

DEATHS!!!! PAINFUL TOO! YOU CAPITALIST SCUM

SWEINHUNDS!" "DIE!"

ANDRE S LANGE MD

The Pain Exchange

Lately my mind has been like a "phone bank," or whatever they used to call those places in the old days, where if you wanted to place a long-distance call, you got connected to an operator who'd talk to you, then plug your wire into a hole that connected you to either the person you were trying to call or to another such operator, who'd then connect you. Except, instead of connecting a call, it is like a phone bank of pain. I think a thought--that leads to a memory trace or to a group of associations to that idea. Those inevitably are plugged into the associated pain server. A massive feedback flood of pain rushes to my thalamus.

I instantly try to "hang-up," to disconnect literally, the thought that led to so much pain, way too much to stand. But it won't let me hang up! It won't let me disconnect. I am STUCK literally and figuratively with all this pain. So, then my mind goes on a logic-search--how to stop this process?--how to short-circuit this crappy pattern? First--how long has pattern been occurring? Well--at least since 2004...no wait, likely since ~1998. In some form, since 1998 it has been going on, but it has grown much worse, much more intense since 2004, and likely worse since 2009.

To make matters more complicatedly agonizing, when it connects to the "pain-association cortex" areas, it also runs just a few side wires into holes that lead to.....of all things-----------pleasure. So, the things that bring pleasure also bring pain. But I am thinking these thoughts first and foremost to feel the associated good feelings--like the pleasure, the laughter, the happiness. What has happened to the associated emotional charges that are/were connected to my memories? How has it happened that memories that used to provoke only great positive associated emotions now--the same memories---when I try to cheer myself up--lead me further down the rabbit hole of agony?

It is like someone has gotten into my memory like a computer virus does to one's hard drive, and mucked with my thought/memory---feeling-associations and changed the ratios of good to bad and pleasure to pain.

How does one change these back? Any neurohackers out there know a way to put right the associations and feelings that are supposed to be matched with the thoughts?(PM me.) Do you have to know how to write "emotico-java?" The thing my mind naturally starts doing is to avoid the thoughts all-together--that is, its one and only log of what used to be known as "happy thoughts." It is avoiding all of those (its only source of pleasure) because they are now INCREASING pain instead of alleviating it. So, then the mind kicks back in and says "if happy thoughts-files have been corrupted, then you are fucked!----the best you can do is meditate. Have no thoughts." Thank God for it coming up with this idea. It appears now to be the only solace.

Life Vs Art

Somewhere, it is said, in some movie titled I-can't-recall (and certainly in a book, prior to that I am sure....)

That life imitates art.....or, or was it, art APES life...well goddamimmit, it was one or the other............and I pretty sure it was conceivably not the former.

Cue music now (Phil Collins "Sue sue psuedio!" rolls with credits.....)

Jan 2010 (the year the HAL-9000 redeems himself)

Argument With Self

I am posting an argument I have been having with myself,

not really for public consumption, but just maybe to help me

figure what to do or not.

it regard the 'appropriateness" or 'inappropriateness"

of posting a chapter of Apeshit that i wrote a long time

ago, about events that occurred in 1986 in Italy.

It is a very difficult subject, and is exquisitely

personal. But, memoirs tend to be that way.

Nevertheless, the content of the story is well

unsettling to say the least.

I am Not afraid about pissing off someone else

involved in the memory/incidents, but the

general reader may (wrongly) jump to the

conclusion that what is related is "just too

far out to be real," then dismiss the rest of

the book that is nowhere near THAT weird.

So, one argument is--well you already wrote it

and it helped YOU to purge the scary difficult

memories and WRITE it up.....so you might

as well put it out there.

The other counter argument is that folks

of limited or conventional knowledge will conclude

that the writer is a nut.

It is always very dangerous to be perceived

as crazy.

It is very dangerous and nearly certainly

leads to persecution, even torture.

So, you see why this particular episode of my

life that occurred in Italy one night, might

be a hard thing to consider really putting

into print.

Yet, a recent movie was made about the

very same subject matter,

which was very accurate,

and maybe THAT indicates that the

general public COULD accept reading

such a thing. (?)

the movie I refer to is, the new

Milla Jovovich film

"The Fourth Kind."

I plan to put up a review of that,

likely on my other website,

News, Rants, Reviews, Etc.

Unsure what to do about the

Padua chapter.

Will meditate more on it...

he says as the flame on the candle

grows to three times its

previous size and height.

Long Seduction

A coupla years ago, right around this time of year, yeah, almost exactly--some really weird shit was going on in my world. My personal world. I was at a loss to explain it at the time.

But since I have had two long years to think it over, I have concluded that it was not a devious Machiavellian mind-fuck done at my expense for kicks. I have also concluded that it was not completely illogical the way this being went about "meeting" me and "studying" me. It was like "stalking" but it never went over the line--you know, just showing up frequently in places I frequented, often amazingly in a hotel room down just down the hall from mine (this part was nearly constant for 2 and 1/2 months--the hotel deal), trying to get access to our hotel's security camera tapes (video) to make a copy for herself, especially when we were both in the picture. No doubt the latter thing reflects her years of "Hollywood" brainwashing and she wanted those tapes to make some sordid film to masturbate to. I take that back, it was devious and it was a mind-fuck.

But, I repeat, it was not Machiavellian. It was a mind-fuck in a literal sense. And it was devious in that only a bedeviled woman like Judith could have come up with this incredible complexity--like an obsessive witch who likes to work puzzles! But it was not done with malice or ill-will.

There is a link to a bunch of photos where the great majority of the antics occurred--I don't want to name the hotel, as I promised I would not, except for the plug I will give them in a book. You may have to become my Facebook friend to see the pictures, I am unsure of that.

It is well-documented from several xenobiological expert sources that the courting rituals and mating rituals of her species are exceedingly bizarre, prolonged (at times painfully) and complex, especially for other humanoid species to understand, much less tolerate.

It often involves vile language use, even hate-speech or threatening terms, and obscene words (what ever those are.) It involves metaphor exquisitely, and these must be interpreted exactly, lest horrible attrition result. Let's not leave out the ESPionage and technological cluster-fuck. It appears to involve hacking. At least, on Gaia, that is what it is called in 2007-2009. Hacking--unauthorized entry into private computer systems.

It involves or has involved HORRIFIC PERIODS OF WAITING. To males not of her genetic origin, or only partly sharing that lineage, these periods of waiting are EXCRUCIATINGLY painful and are obviously totally unnecessary and undesirable. So, in essence, part of the "courting/mating" behaviour of these freakazoids is to "turn off" the very person you are trying to "turn on!" Go figure. If I had only found that V/K dictionary I needed in A'dam it would have all been much less painful and more logical. But after searching 6 bookstores with extensive foreign/alien clientele, I found my search for such a book in vain. I just had to gut it out.

They (several non-Earth natives) say the human today is the monkey of the year 2012, but if I were the turtle, I would say to the rabbit, "corre corre tia!" Apeshit!

Finally, another bit of Apeshit!

This is, finally, another actual chapter from my memoir, Apeshit.

Red lightning flashed, arcing in the sky over the Prinsengracht, making cosmic reflections for us all, as I took a huge lungfull of Nederweed Dutch Superpolm #47. My green glass hookah gurgled with all the gorgeous intonations of the borborygmi of the spheres. Strumming my ukulele, I sang "And the band played on." It was 3 A.M. At last, I was feeling no pain (finally!)

The black and white cat that hung out in the back courtyard of the Hotel Prinsen mewed melodically, as if, perhaps, he liked the song. Meanwhile, back in the jungle (of my hotel room) I was busy writing a screenplay for a bunch of rich, spoiled, silly-assed actresses and actors that will not be named here. They will, however be named in another chapter. The regen lovingly pelted the Japanese miniature oak trees and the pines in the terrace. I was fortunate enough to have a room on the ground floor (which is, like, the basement, in Europe)--my windows opened out onto the patio of the terrace. Windows slightly ajar, so I could smell the rain and the perfume of the jasmine flowers that were about 8 meters from the room. The fragrance, combined with the lovely taste and smell of the kif was ecstatically orgasmic. Truly. By this point I was getting pretty mellow and relaxed, feelin' good. The words were coming easily to my hand as I re-wrote the screenplay in longhand. My computer was too unreliable and "weirdly glitchy"--unpredictable in a predictable unfunny pattern, if you get my drift. I had just had fantastic sex with an alien-themed duo of beautiful escorts, and earlier that day I had a surprise visit from my Dutch girlfriend, who only had fifteen minutes, literally. She was being held against-her-will by a bunch of "Romulan"-sympathizer fascist assholes at a place called "Mentrum" on Tweede Constantijn Huygenstraat.

She had a 45-minute "pass" to go outside. I visited her there at the concentration camp ("Mentrum") as often as I was permitted and always smuggled her shaggies that I had previously rolled with good Lebanese hash inside. Back to the moment in the rainstorm, yours truly was doing the 97th re-write of the Star Trek screenplay for the ungrateful infidels (at Paramount Pictures.) Thunder erupted with a powerful magnitude (I estimated about 110 decibels--really,)---the sound, via my delightful cocktail of kif and shots of Bessenjenever, morphed into a thundercast of "Shut-The-Fuck-Up!", (a pop-song I heard in a disco on Leidseplein.) I was nearly nude, wearing nothing but my Georgio Armani silk underwear that I bought for 35 Euros at Magna Plaza. Nee, I also had the Japanese yukata I had just bought that very day in Zeedijk, on as well.

The sweet woman at the counter in the Asian store in the Zeedijk area told me "you have a green and orange penis," whatever that meant. To which, I replied, "whatever" and "bedankt." I had done my usual re-wiring of the hotel room, turning off/disabling all the usual moron-supervision devices. The sconce lighting fluorescent bulbs were still a bit too bright due to the 5 grams of Copelandia cyanescens I had for breakfast earlier that day. So, I put my purple "Eat It Raw" tee-shirt (from the Silver Bucket Oyster Bar that I had saved since I was 15 years old) over the top of the sconce. It added a nice hue to the visuals that were still playfully lingering. The bed was still wet and reeked of pussy and cum. The cool welcome humidity of this soaked though the yukata. Incidentally, FYI, these visuals were not kaleidoscopic fractal imagery, rather, strange black and white elfin-looking two-dimensional creatures that scurried playfully around the room, touching nothing. Re-starting the re-write of the third section of the screenplay, wherein I tissue-interview Seven-Of-Nine, with a cat-o-nine-tails, I, Andre, was startled suddenly (very suddenly!) from my reverie and peaceful oasis on my Amstel river of tranquility by a female moaning in Taiwanese-dialect Mandarin---loudly.

She was obviously orgasming and involuntarily howled this wonderful sound--which simultaneously struck me as beautiful and also caused me to do one of those cartoon-like "hybeea-hybeeah" double-takes, and quickly realize that I recognized that voice. It was Sabrina Lee, my former psychiatrist from California. I was dumbstruck! For once!

I had been living in Amsterdam for about three months and was currently experiencing "european cashflow problems." Sitting cross-legged, in the lotus position three earth-days prior to this, I had been meditating (literally) on a lovely bridge over a canal at Zeedijk. Tour buses had disgorged their loads of Asian tourists and they proceeded, led by a young woman holding little red flag, in a herd, to parade in front of me. Deep into meditation, I was not looking carefully at the people as they went by. De pronto, out of my right-eye peripheral vision I saw Sabrina Lee and her friend Huoung Ho moving to my right at a fairly quick pace. My head nearly exploded. I tried to yell, but I could not speak, and the din of the crowd chattering in 19 different languages along with the outboard motors of the boats passing beneath me under the bridge contributed to the impossibility of my being heard anyway. Quickly, attempting to get up and go chase after her, I found my legs were stiff and would not move fast enough, due to sitting in the lotus position for 1/2 hour. By the time I got to my feet, and regained speech, I ran in their direction, faster than most people move. But there were hundreds of faces, hundreds of Asian faces, hundreds of pretty and ugly Asian faces, but I could not find my lover. I searched in that direction and about the Chinatown area of Zeedijk for another forty-five minutes or so for my former psychiatrist, in vain. I was "barbecued." That really hurt.

Jumping back to three days in the future, I had just heard the "di'"(beautiful in Mandarin)--~sixty-second orgasm-moan-song. Then I instantly recognized the voice--because she and I had seen each other weekly from 1998 to 2004. I at that time was also a psychiatrist, and was seeing her for psychotherapy. Strangely enough, in June of 2004 we became lovers, but that is not in this book. However, hearing her wail, I was flabbergasted! And she had the frikkin' audacity and ovaries to track me (somehow) and rent the room above me and be fucking someone that I later learned through covert channels "allegedly" was Robert Kennedy, Jr! I stopped my writing project dead in my tracks and laid back in bed. I began to meditate and focus on the couple upstairs. I began to use some of Russell Targ's techniques. I got a vision of Sabrina's smiling face.

At first, I was homicidally angry! Then, I thought about her (and him.) Then, I just wanted to kill HIM. Then I laughed out loud. Because I always liked Robert Kennedy (his dad, except for his heinous decision in the Senate illegalizing LSD-25.) And, I had kept up with Robert Kennedy, Jr.'s legal work on the environment and liked what he had done. So, the progression of feeling-thoughts is: at first a strong urge to kill both of them with a "Klingon" Ba'Le'th, then just kill him, then maybe just slap her, but ultimately I decided to say what the hell and vowed I would never send RKF, Jr. any more money.

To this day I haven't given any more money to his organization, but I still admire his work, and I was happy that, at least Sabrina was fucking Democrats! That was a good sign. I took it as a Buddhist good sign. I may have been the first Democrat she ever fucked.....and I am glad I helped her see the light.

Comments on the Left and Obama

These are some comments I posted on Yahoo's Buzz Up regarding an article in the US News and World Report--see article below:

Obama's Battle With the Liberal Wing of the Democratic Party

U.S. News & World Report 

    By Kenneth T. Walsh Kenneth T. Walsh – Fri May 29, 11:32 am ET

Four decades ago, the liberal, antiwar wing of the Democratic Party helped to force President Lyndon B. Johnson from office. Specifically, Johnson decided not to run for re-election in 1968 in large part because of rising primary challenges and increasingly vitriolic demonstrations against him. One chant that was heard often at anti-Vietnam War rallies was "Hey, hey, LBJ, how many kids did you kill today?"

The level of anger now is nowhere close to that level, but there are warning signs that President Obama is starting to generate serious opposition on the fiery left. There is increasing unease about his sending 21,000 more troops into Afghanistan, which some compare to the early escalations in Vietnam. [Read about Obama's 12 most important decisions]

There is disquiet that Obama has abandoned his promise to release photos showing brutal interrogations of suspected terrorists.[Read about Obama's torture problem]

There is consternation that he is moving toward using military tribunals to prosecute some terrorists, that he has not banned assault weapons, and that he has not acted aggressively enough to protect a woman's right to have an abortion.

Many liberals are also unhappy that Obama shows no interest in a "single payer" healthcare system in which the government would take the lead in guaranteeing adequate medical treatment. [Read about Obama's uphill battle to reform healthcare]

Among the groups that have been ratcheting up their criticism of Obama are the American Civil Liberties Union, Amnesty International, Public Citizen, and members of the 77-member congressional Progressive Caucus. [Read about Obama's journey from charismatic to polarizing]

But despite the disappointment in some quarters, most liberal Democrats have been giving President Obama a pass on his centrist policies, and he still enjoys high approval ratings from the public. The question is whether the overall patience of leaders and voters on the left will last much longer. [Read about why Obama's job rating stays so high]

White House strategists express confidence that they can keep most liberals in line for the foreseeable future. One reason is that Americans on the left have such lengthy wish lists on issues ranging from healthcare reform to legalizing gay marriage. They don't want to create any permanent break with Obama.

And White House officials say this core of the Democratic Party, with some exceptions, will continue to give its president the benefit of the doubt. They point to a meeting that Obama held with the Progressive Caucus in late April. "It was very cordial," recalls one attendee. "The sense I got from that meeting was that there was a clear desire to work through their differences and try to find compromises. There were no flash points."

It appears that after eight years of a Republican in the White House, liberals are willing to muffle their dissent. "There is such an overriding sense of relief that it's Obama and not George W. Bush in the White House," says Geoff Garin, a veteran Democratic pollster. "There is a pretty strong inclination to cut him a lot of slack." Garin also says that liberals "may say he is not tough enough on the banks or that he's keeping the troops in [Iraq] too long and not delivering quickly enough on 'don't ask, don't tell' [to change policy and allow gays to serve openly in the military]. But they are still delighted and thrilled that he is president of the United States." It also helps in muting opposition that Obama and White House officials are reaching out regularly to inform liberal leaders of what Obama is doing and to get feedback. The president's speech Thursday defending his plans to close the Guantánamo Bay prison--a move that is widely supported on the left--was part of that outreach. [Read about the members of Obama's inner circle]

White House advisers add that Obama will be pushed only so far to the left, and with good reason. Only 19 percent of Americans, after all, identify themselves as liberal, compared with 36 percent who say they are moderate and 41 percent who say they are conservative, according to the latest poll by Democracy Corps, a Democratic think tank.

Still, the next few months will be a time of testing. How many compromises will Obama accept on healthcare and on legislation designed to limit global warming and reduce U.S. reliance on foreign oil? How far will he go in courting conservatives on issues ranging from national security to abortion? Is he sliding ever deeper into a morass in Afghanistan, as LBJ did in Vietnam early in his presidency? [Read about Obama's challenges in Afghanistan]

The looming fight over Obama's nomination of Sonia Sotomayor for the Supreme Court should ingratiate him to some critics for the time being, since she has strong support among liberals. But the overall uneasiness on the left is real and will remain a serious long-term problem for the new president.

My comments, also posted on Yahoo's Buzz Up:

Well,as I see it, IN OUR HUMBLE OPINION, we, the ultra-left of the Democratic Party must be RELENTLESS...that is, we have to keep track of each and everything President Obama is saying, doing and thinking, as well as all his advisors, cabinet, etc.  I made the mistake during the Clinton years of getting complacent, and figuring Bill would just do "the left thing"....but, shiest!  He increased the Drug War, screwed up equality for gays/lesbians, and did not significantly help the health-care debacle.  Granted, he did a lot of good things, such as not starting wars, balancing the budget, producing a surplus, etc.

But we lefties must be on Barack's ass about everything, and be unremitting and uncompromising.  The two fascist wars that Bush et al started, along with the attempted right wing coup of 9/11, gives us a clear starting point.  We must take our righteous anger to the streets and channel it in positive directions to teach Joe six-pack and Soccer-mom Sally that the "liberal agenda" is IN THEIR FAVOR!  We also need to seize control of the mainstream media and maginalize fascist monopolies, like FOX, MSNBC etc.  We must get the truth to the people (to be cynical, "the unwashed masses") and make the truth simple, understandable and palatable to them.  

The pressure is on US, and no other group can do as much good for ourselves (the USA) and the world.  It is due to the left and the union movement that we have weekends off, that we have any sort of national health-care (crappy and the world-wide disgrace that it is), and basically freedom of expression in general.

Time has come today!  Let us join together and organize, increase unions, march in the street (and not just in San Fran!), demand change, sign countless petitions, personally lobby the president and Congresspeople.  They WILL do what we DEMAND that they do.  It is our responsibility to make these changes a reality.  One last note, regarding something that needs MAJOR reform is the PRISON-INDUSTRIAL-COMPLEX-----there are FAR too many ways to get arrested in the USA.  It is, and I am not exaggerating, now like the old Soviet Union at its worst!  We MUST dismantle this Machiavellian horrific travesty--and it starts by dismantling the root of it all---The Drug War.  Adults must be allowed to put what ever plant, chemical, object or whatever into their own bodies.  Without this, we are little more than slaves, clearly indicating that we are OWNED by the State, rather than the State being for the people, of the people, by the people.  We must take BACK Cognitive Liberty!  It is the root of all other rights.